Sunday, January 23, 2005
Late-Night Jokes
Leno
The inauguration was a very emotional moment. Laura Bush had tears in her eyes, the president’s mom Barbara Bush had tears in her eyes... John Kerry had tears in his eyes.
Letterman
The inauguration was yesterday. I tell you things are really starting to look bad for John Kerry.
Leno
Well it was cold and bitter at the inauguration today, but enough about John Kerry.
Here’s some exciting news - according to the "New York Post”, both Al Gore and John Kerry are thinking of running for president in 2008. Gore and Kerry again! Political experts say it’s too early to tell who would lose bigger!
Did anybody get this week’s "Newsweek”? In this week’s magazine, John Kerry says he didn’t lose the election, he just didn’t win. There’s that clear decisive thinking we all loved about him.
Congratulations to President Bush. He has been named Time magazine’s person of the year. Of course when President Bush heard the news, he was stunned. He said, "I don’t even subscribe to Time magazine."
I still don’t think Bush gets it. Like today he kept asking people, "So where’s Ed McMahon with my big check?"
In a related story, Senator John Kerry was given a free copy of Entertainment Weekly.
Leno
The inauguration was a very emotional moment. Laura Bush had tears in her eyes, the president’s mom Barbara Bush had tears in her eyes... John Kerry had tears in his eyes.
Letterman
The inauguration was yesterday. I tell you things are really starting to look bad for John Kerry.
Leno
Well it was cold and bitter at the inauguration today, but enough about John Kerry.
Here’s some exciting news - according to the "New York Post”, both Al Gore and John Kerry are thinking of running for president in 2008. Gore and Kerry again! Political experts say it’s too early to tell who would lose bigger!
Did anybody get this week’s "Newsweek”? In this week’s magazine, John Kerry says he didn’t lose the election, he just didn’t win. There’s that clear decisive thinking we all loved about him.
Congratulations to President Bush. He has been named Time magazine’s person of the year. Of course when President Bush heard the news, he was stunned. He said, "I don’t even subscribe to Time magazine."
I still don’t think Bush gets it. Like today he kept asking people, "So where’s Ed McMahon with my big check?"
In a related story, Senator John Kerry was given a free copy of Entertainment Weekly.
